Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
