my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
