is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
