Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
