ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
