I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Randomize
