Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Randomize
