i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Just pee around me
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
