PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
