Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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