..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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