life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Randomize
