U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
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