her vagine was all disorganized.
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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