is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I am midnight drunk by noon
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
