They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
