everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
