I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize
