kristin has been a bad kristin
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I want a musical about memes.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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