sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
