Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Randomize
