have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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