i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
