I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
