Having a random hookup so left but love u
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Randomize
