I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
