Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
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