found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
