____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
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