Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
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