i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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