her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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