I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
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