Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
