sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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