If i come over, it means nothing
i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
