Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
