apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
