I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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