Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
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