you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
