Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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