i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I made him laugh his dick is mine
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
