your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
