Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
