do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Randomize
