You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
false alarm, still single
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