Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
