How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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