The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
